Monday, January 20, 2014

Monday, January 20, 2014
3

LEGAL ADVICE ON STEROIDS


News in this week from the resort of Pattaya on Thailand’s eastern seaboard is that Thailand’s most famous American, Drew Noyes, has secured deals with the local steroid King of Steroids.

Now, short of selling crack cocaine, the steroid market is one of the most lucrative in the world because in western countries steroids can usually only be obtained on subscription.

And thousands of men are desperate for these testosterone based products which give them big pecs, big biceps, and according to medical evidence oh so small balls - and if you're a woman - a deep voice.

The local top man on the steroid block is Johnny from Northern Ireland. He is in his own little world importing powders from China and in a makeshift laboratory has a guy turning them into injectables. It does not appear to be illegal in Thailand to sell steroids over the counter because they are so easy to obtain in shops.

In fact they are so freely available in Pattaya that some people come on ‘Steroid Tourism’ holidays, the Sydney Morning Herald has reported.

Pattaya’s most famous steroid tourist is New Zealander Tim Ward, also known as Sharky, a self confessed sex tourist and former money lender (and enforcer) who apparently charges working girls a 500 baht fee for his protection services. (They supposedly call him if the punters do not pay up).
But it is certainly illegal to export them to countries like the United States, Britain etc., and import them without a licence.
Tim Ward 'Sharky'  'They went thataway!'

Johnny’s predecessors in Pattaya were fellow Britons , Edwin Crawley, and Ashley Livingstone. In a joint operation between the United States DEA and the Narcotics Suppression Bureau, Crawley and Livingston, were arrested at the request of the USA – and extradited. But not before they had spent considerable time in a jail in Thailand. They were charged with the international trading of anabolic steroids and money laundering.

They had acquired a wealth of over US$600,000. Crawley did not live to enjoy his wealth. He died in 2011 shortly after he had been released from a Federal Prison, of complications arising out of pneumonia. Both had been sentenced to the equivalent of time served – just over two years.

They were incidentally held in Thailand pending extradition on charges of illegally importing the drugs from China and illegally dealing in them.
Edwin Crawley - Pattaya Daily News

Of course had Crawley returned to Thailand (where he said he was tortured but probably not by the squeezing balls method) to recover his cash he would not have found anything left anyway.

Now balding overweight Johnny has had similar problems about what to do with his money. He has six vehicles apparently and as many houses. So when in doubt in Pattaya who do you turn to if you have not checked ‘Google’?

Yes none other than the city’s most re-assuring American Drew Walter Noyes and his One-Stop-Legal-Services-Center. 


Now Mr. Noyes has taken a very tough line on drugs – almost to a hysterical level. He is outraged apparently that the Thonglor Clinic in Jomtien – that is the clinic he is accused of attempting to extort 7 million baht out of – has been using, he says, illegal drugs. 


'I am protecting the citizens of Pattaya' claimed Drew Noyes after his arrest with Wanrapa Boonsu for the
alleged extortion of the Pattaya clinic. They are currently on trial.
This does not appear to be the case but it still makes a the lead spoof story on the website of the newspaper he founded the now defunct PattayaTimes, but Johnny’s literal skills I understand are not good. He used to be an understudy at Tony’s Gym in Pattaya – (short time rooms 250 baht self administered hand relief only)

Apparently an American also in the steroid business in Pattaya is laughing his socks off but I cannot confirm Johnny has actually signed on the dotted line yet. But just how secretive these guys are is demonstrated by this story.

Drew Noyes is not known for his discretion about client information. Every client or friend he has fallen out with he has ratted on...that includes a retired American pilot, a native American Indian, a Dutch children's TV producer, a retired US publisher, a British heating system installer....

Johnny might be better off driving one of his cars to the U.S. Embassy, putting his hands up and handing over the cash for his flight to New York.

Meanwhile he has several websites out there on the net promoting his products under the names MAXPRO or Pharmamedstore which also offers Kamagra, Maxpropharma etc.

If his packages are seized by US Customs he promises an immediate new delivery at HALF PRICE!
Way to go Johnny, er, and Drew.




Johnny does not send his packages with a valid return address. However if anybody wishes to return the products from whence they came we can probably help.


Drew-Noyes-photoshop (Weapon)

Advice for Johnny please!

Part of Pattaya City's Attractions -Sharky's advice below:




3 comments:

  1. I knew Sharky would make it here sooner or later. Steroids make you retain water and Sharky has that bloated face most growth hormone and roid abusers have. You also get acne on the face and back and your skin gets a greasy look like your covered in oil. Look at Joe Rogan who commentates for the UFC, he admits he takes testosterone and he has the permanently greasy look. That's why so many of these guys shave their heads, it's because of the oil being excreted on the scalp. Prostate cancer can be the end result of roid abuse.

    If you take testosterone your body stops producing it naturally so if you stop the roids you can end up with low testosterone. Then you have 'roid rage' where your liver gets ruined. Add in baldness, acne, greasy skin and the potential for prostate cancer then roids are only for try-hard's like Sharky.

    When I was doing martial arts the toughest and meanest guys I knew weren't muscular at all. Most of the big muscle-bound guys were slow and useless and went to water if you really hit them. They have no stamina or heart, that's why they need the roids. It's a self-esteem issue with most of these guys. Obviously if you get into a wrestling match with big bastards like Sharky your in trouble. Sharky makes a big target though. You wouldn't miss. LOL



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  2. Got to say....Noisy is looking "Buff and dam fine" these days.........
    Grrrrrrrrrrr

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  3. Actually Sharkey has very little water retention as doesnt have a bloated body,he takes growth hormone and steroids which the growth hormone keeps you quite lean.he has no acne or grease..not everyone has this side effect and he does not....they dont shave there heads because of grease.....maybe because of hair loss but as he not young then even without steroids would probably suffer from hair loss and for sure steroids thin your hair but grease no!!you dont get roid rage due to low testosterone but due to having very high testosterone as testosterone is what makes a male a male!! high Test will make you prone to fight more and be angry more especially if you are like that and then take steroids hence road rage and rage in general..if you already have high testosterone and take steroids then of course you will be angry more but if you a nice guy and take steroids then is possible chance of being a dickhead but if a dickhead before steroids then for sure will be an idiot with more test in the system!!your liver gets elevated enzymes during taking steroids sure as trying to clear the shit but if short term then liver will return to normal..if long term then ofcourse more chance of damage..same as alcohol!!Many UFC guys are on steroids and would kick the shit out of you on or off steroids but they take to try give them an edge and because others are on the gear but many are steroid heads and have more aggresssion but would still fuck you without steroids.....so yes there are many guys who are braver with gear but dont say they are nothing without gear as i know many who are nutters with out any gear but with gear then worse and would fuck up many people without gear.....yes a normal guy who takes steroids is not good fighter just because of the gear but a good fighter with gear can be more of a handful believe me(have a look at ufc guys as most take gear now even if they didnt before).many guys go the gym and take gear and think they are tough guys and ofcourse they are not and can be knocked out easy as speed more important than size in a fight but if they have skills before the gear then they will be ok..most bouncers take gear and can fight ok with or without but need a bit of size for intimidation as part of there job! Sharkey is a stocky guy without gear and came up the ranks even without gear but as they get older then muscle and aggression lowers so a boost is what its all about......sharkey lost a lot of respect when he pulls a knife on joe public when he has the size and skills to do him without a weapon so he now been a dickhead and fucked himself with that shit.... also he think can walk around with big gold and no one fuck him..wrong ..as he found out with the police stealing it,yes he made a rant at the police station..wow so brave,did he get his shit back ..no is the answer and becomes a rat too so if you cant beat them then join them seems to be the order.....so so much for his anti police stand as he has been defeated by the boys in brown mafia and joined them so fuck you tough guy now quiet as a mouse for many years .....fucking grass cunt and wants show off he can fuck beach girls...wow any cunt can do that in Thailand........never mind you join the tosser arse licker neils Colon as he tell you is good idea to join the thai mafia,hasnt done him any harm apart from anyone with a brain would dissassociate from any cunt who joins them..he dont even realise they just laugh about him and dont respect him or consider him a friend even he thinks he is..hes a commodity that is expendable and when he dont grass up his fellow expats then he will be gone as soon as his grassing up doesnt bring much results for them.

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